Because you want to know, I can tell.
No broadband for me!
I called Telstra (yet again) today and finally managed to speak to someone who investigated the situation. The problem is a loading coil on the line. So, no ADSL, no cable and no wireless. Just dial up.
Thanks to Neil at BigPond to whom I spoke today and who bothered to chase it up rather than tell me I should be 'more proactive' as another consultant did or fob me off with a load of tosh. And thanks also to Jase at BigPondTeam who tweeted me after reading my post hoping to come up with a solution. A third round of thanks goes to PaulS at Scribbly, who gave me the lowdown on loading coils.
Bugger! There, I think that covers it.