Saturday, 28 January 2012

Jottings from the Tropics: 28 January 2012


The huntsman spider has departed. Possibly of its own volition, possibly...er...frogmarched out of the window frame in front of waiting cameras. I don’t know. Both Litoria rubella have returned to their favourite spots. And they were looking very smug when I saw them last night. I realise that smug is a natural expression for a frog, but this pair appeared particularly pleased with themselves. I almost expected one of them to say to me, ‘This is the most humble day of my life.’

- o O o -


I engaged in a staring contest with the lesser sooty owl yesterday evening. I gave in after about a minute. But not because the owl possessed a superior staring ability. No. I gave in because I felt guilty. It wasn’t fair to the owl to have a larger predator (me) looking at it in a threatening fashion. Just so you know. I could have totes won.

- o O o -

The pademelon population has grown thanks to a few transients. This morning Pip and Red had the company of another joey, a half-grown female and an adult female with a pouch so full that I can only assume it was full of shoplifted goods. I’m beginning to wonder if they aren’t rehearsing a marsupial version of ‘Oliver Twist’. After Red’s performance over the fruit salad, I think I’m being cast in the role of Mr Bumble the beadle.

- o O o -

And while I’m in character, I almost drove off the road this morning because I was so irritated by a radio announcer. This is not a new phenomenon, although it is a transferred one. I used to yell abuse at the television, but the analogue signal went off on 6 December. No more little, granular, ghosting people to swear at. No more glass-fronted target for my insults. The radio is all I have.

What drove me to distraction was his use of the term ‘crowd sourcing’. He said that he had crowd sourced the answer to a question. What he had done was ask. Ask. It was the BBC World Service too. Don’t make me write letters, BBC. I haven’t been Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells for years now.

So if you were on the Atherton road this morning and saw someone shouting obscenities at their dashboard, I apologise for the discomfort. I hope you covered your children’s eyes and ears and drove on. But, really...crowd sourcing?

2 comments:

Duncan said...

My favourite read every morning!

Snail said...

Thanks, Duncan! It's almost (but not quite) non-stop action here, albeit on a very small scale.