Tuesday 12 February 2008

Science Made Stupid

    Newton's Laws

    Isaac Newton also used direct observation to formulate his laws.

    Newton was in government service for many years. His first law states:

    * A body at rest tends to remain at rest, while a body in motion at a constant velocity in a straight line tends to continue in that motion.

    Clearly, this law is based on first-hand observation of a bureaucracy in action.

    One night, Newton became engaged in a heated argument at a local bar over a question of epicycles, leading him to punch his opponent in the nose. After being thoroughly worked over, Newton comtemplated the results and announced his next law:

    * Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.

    In a well-known story, Newton discovered gravity when he was hit on the head while sitting under an apple tree. This tale is, of course, fictitious. It was actually a fig tree, and the result was his best-known theory:

    * I bet you could make a swell cookie out of these figs.


You can read more of Tom Weller's 1986 Hugo Award winner Science Made Stupid here.

I especially like his chapter on the Earth. At last, someone ties in Shakespeare with atmospheric dynamics. But this chart of geological periods is disturbingly similar to one I marked in a recent exam. I wish I were making that up.
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Hat tip to dark* :)